Sunday, November 6, 2011

Track Checker: Nelly "Just a Dream"

Hey YO! While we in the USA are turning our clocks back for whatever reason, let us all go ahead and turn back our clocks WAY, WAY BACK. All the way back to when Nelly (yes, the band-aid faced Missourian) had a song in the Billboard top 10. No, we’re not going back ten years or something that you would expect, we’re going all the way back to this year! 2011! Nelly had a song in the top 10 in January of this year! What in the hot hell? I think this is something we need to investigate. Not that we care about charts, but we are wondering what’s wrong with you consumers. Is Nelly still making waves in popular culture? How can whatever this song is sell enough downloads to make a list of popular songs so recently? I don't know. So are we way out of touch or is this song actually good? Let’s find out…

Nelly “Just a Dream”

Nelly - Just A Dream by justblase

If this is what’s popular then we are way out of touch. This is worse than I imagined.

If you ever loved somebody putcha hands up! (Repeat)

Can you imagine those words in a song. No? Well you don’t have to imagine, it’s a reality. HEY NELLY, WHO IS THIS SONG SUPPOSED TO APPEAL TO? Is this something your crew can relate to?*Twerp! Twerp! I’m juss tryna’ make that radio cut for the label an tha ladies…get that money big shots”  – Nelly. Well you might have done a good job with the song, I mean you got the top ten position and all, but this song is really, really bad. It’s like Nelly was trying to follow the formula for the perfect hit: established brand, check; glossy music, check; electric guitars, check; harmony, check; autotune, check; inane rapping about love, check. This is one of the emptiest songs I have ever heard. Hollow. A poor substitute for music.
*I'm sure your crew consists of other millionaires and the Missouri elite, no commoners.

Now wait. Could this song be about fame? Yeah, it could be, but that doesn’t make it better, it’s still crapola. Why do people keep buying this stuff? Our country is ruined…our planet is ruined. Nelly is part of the machine that has clutched onto the vulnerabilities of people and sold them what they think they want. How did I get involved with this? Did I fall or was I pushed? You know what? Nobody wants this trash. It’s garbage. It’s just a soiled fast food container that some fat cat executive conceived of and pushed onto the masses. And the masses bought it for some reason, a LOT of people. And then they ate it all. You're the fat cats. WHY? Why do you do this to yourselves? Stop the Nelly. Hopefully this will be the last time we see Nelly ever, but somehow I doubt it. That's just my dream.

Just a Dream Score 0/10

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