Monday, December 19, 2011

Yo! Check Out My Cover: OJ Da Juiceman "I Got Tropicana Flow"

Artist: OJ Da Juiceman
Album: "I Got Tropicana Flow" (Mixtape)
Available: DatPiff 
Uploaded: March 3, 2011
Listens: 2,889

This is where I review an album cover without listening to the album. Enjoy.

Well, we all like to look at good album covers and we all like Orange Juice! So this post will appeal to everyone and probably get a million hits! And don't think that this post was paid for by BIG ORANGE JUICE BUSINESS, because it wasn't (drink tropicana!)! Okay, so let's try and figure out who is responsible for this mixtape and all the orange. I would guess OJ Da Juiceman (wouldn't you?) since it says that, but then who are DJ Envious Styles and DJ Faded? And which one of the three has Tropicana Flow (probably OJ, DUH). Now, I know what you're saying already: all of "OJ DA JUICEMAN'S album covers usually look exactly like this, so this post is dumb." And you're right! All his covers really bank on that orange juice theme, and seriously how weird is that. It's a weird gimmick, Eminem kills his girlfriend or wife or something, that's his gimmick, Snoop Dogg is drugs, and this guy is orange juice. It's a wholesome approach.

Lets break this cover down!

I see a mansion and palm trees, so that's something. Florida, I guess. Then we have a bunch of giant juice boxes. That's weird. And Waka Flocka is on there (of course), just sitting on a giant juice box and holding up a backpack (or his image was pulled from his "Ohletsdoit" video, which it was, whatever). He looks a little irritated that someone would just superimpose a construction zone safety backpack on his hand. But it must be really important to do all that photoshop work so let's just say that it's full of oranges for an orphanage.

But now we get to the main point of this review. OJ DA JUICEMAN AND HIS ORANGE JUICE NECKLACE! OH BROTHER! I mean that necklace is bananas.

I'm not saying that it's not nice, but I would say that it's creepy and weird. Weird in itself, and weird that someone would (1) buy that or make it (2) wear it (3) show it to the camera all the time. I don't have a turtle necklace, but now I see what I have to do to make it in this industry (blogging), and that is get a XXL turtle necklace and flash it at every camera like a police badge.

Jewelry courtesy of Target's Dollar Spot
Wow, so that necklace really hijacked the post here. It is a great necklace, and one of many apparently, and the eyes are numbers and the mouth looks terrible. Plus it has muscles and feet! If I were making that necklace I would definitely skip the feet...and probably skip the arms. Speaking of the arms, the orange is holding the chain like a jump rope...or like he's trying to strangle OJ. Look, little orange necklace, OJ Da Juiceman gave you life, he created you so that you could have number eyes and jump rope all day. Show some respect. He's proud of you, as proud as any father could be. He kisses your straw (see photo below). Who else would do that for you? Now OJ, just keep that little guy away from water, keep him out of bright light, and noooooo food after midnight. What a happy team.

Wait, what were we talking about again. Oh yeah, the cover of some mixtape. It's terrible. There is a guy floating or something in the background. Is he an angel? And some oranges in the sky, are they fruit angels? That's all I have. Another failed post. A waste of everyone's time.

We sincerely wish OJ Da Juiceman and his necklace all the best. Vitamin C! BFFS!

Orange Juice Score 7/10
Cover Art Score: 0/10

Not weird at all.

1 comment:

  1. FUCK u I'm dj faded do something about it bitch I ain't make the cover just host get ur shit str8