Driicky Graham "Snapbacks & Tattoos"

Can you believe that we've been around for twenty-five years and we haven't reviewed a Driicky Graham song yet? No. FUCK YOU. We haven't. In fact, we haven't reviewed a classic Snapback song since the Stack Boys. We're slackin' on the snapbackin', sonny.

If you don't know, Driicky Graham is an eleven year old North Carolina native who is bitter rivals with both T.I. and AZ because they both just use letters for their names. That's 100% true, look it up on your search engine.

Anyway, if there is one thing I like it's Snapbacks because they just look so nice for any occasion. Riding with your mom to BK, buying Halo 3 used at the pawn shop, or even skipping out on synagogue cuz it's so boring (#YOLO), the snapback is the preferred look if you want to make a statement (that you're a dunce bag club poppler).

And Tattoos. So cool. Just get a ton of them and you'll never regret it. Ever. And if you want to upgrade just tattoo over that shit. Boom. A mom heart easily becomes a dragon. A tribal easily becomes a dragon. An owl (for the ladies) easily becomes a dragon. Why would you not have a tattoo?

OH SHIT! What about a tattoo of a snapback? Perfect. If that isn't in this video I'm going to shit on it with a "0/10" score, because a smart artist like Driicky Graham should have definitely thought of that before.

What else? Oh, I've never heard of this guy before, and I would never listen to this song except to kick the shit out of it in a review. Let's listen/watch.



Snapbacks and tattoos
Penelope and Tom Cruise
sick grab the tissues
NyQuils®and DayQuils®
Go to the hospital
Roll on ya stretcha
Holla at the ladies
Caught up in traction

HAHAHA. I still haven't listened to it. I was just doing some B.S.. #sorry. I'll listen to it now.

ME

Eeeee. Yikes. Absolutely nothing new here. Except maybe a stupid way about singing about tattoos. Hats. Cars. Girls. Money. Repeat. Driicky let's me know that I'm now in Swag School. Dude, don't you know I dropped out of school and I'll continue to drop out of all schools.

cool?

 So, Driicky. Can I call you Driicky? Let me get this straight. You say:

"Snapbacks and tattoos. Nice whips, fly chicks, all that, because cash rules."

How exactly is cash ruling connected to Tattoos? I don't understand the connection. Costco Connection? Explain. Explain why your raps suck. You say nothing new at all. Shit, this is just nonsense. Just like that little rap I wrote before. Fuck. Just listing things you like (that everyone likes (honestly)) then you just say things that are in every mixtape ever. So stupid.

IN CONCLUSION: Look, this is pretty basic. No tattoo of a snapback = no points.

SNAPBACKS & TATTOOS SCORE 0/10

tat #swag where ur snapback at

Stack Boys vs. $tack Boys

Our old friends are back again! You remember the $tack Boys right? The wealthy entitled rascals who rap about the stuff they saw at the mall. Yeah, those guys. Your favorites. Snapback a-holes.

Well, they're back with another song called "Socks and Slides", it's the track that everybody has been waiting for...because we all want to know what a couple of preteens think about footware. But this silver lining has a dark cloud brewing. Remember that movie THE DARK KNIGHT? Where the Batman does his thing but then a new villian comes out and he's a real challenge for the hero because he hides his face too or something. You know, the opposite side of the same coin? Well, that same thing is happening to the $tack Boys. Another group has appeared, and it's basically the same situation as the Batman thing. A duo of rappers has come for the $tack Boys crown...and their name is...THE STACK BOYS!!!! TOO !!! GASP!!!!

So we have an official RAP BATTLE! $tack Boys vs. Stack Boys! Stack on stack crime! Who shall win the coveted name? Let's find out!

We'll start with the challenger: THE STACK BOYS and their song "INTRO".

"Stacks in the building, stacks in the building

Jayboi, Tay Tay, Stacks in the building"

See what I mean? You bring a knife, they bring a gun. You $tack Boys at the mall, they Stack Boys on a car! Our stack boys might be in trouble. Let's see if they can fight this fire...



HAHAhA! I want to say "nobody wins with either of the garbage tracks". But we clearly have a winner. The $tack Boys (the kids wildin' at the mall) have officially lost to The Stack Boys (the guys wilding in a driveway).

THE STACK BOYS WIN!

CONGRATULATIONS!

How did they win, you ask? That's simple. The mall kids sound timid, they use a fake ass hyphy beat, they rhyme about dumb shit, they filmed their crap video at the mall, AND THEY SPANK EACH OTHER IN THE VIDEO.

The other Stack Boys (no dollar sign) at least sound excited to be rapping. The beat is just as lousy but at least they aren't rapping about the SHIT THEY SEE AT THE MALL. Plus a few of the lines are clever and some of the production choices aren't bad. Plus a back-and-forth! Not bad, but still not good. I mean some of the lines are weak, and the beat sounds really old (like they found it at a garage sale), and the video is just around their (pretty nice) neighborhood.

But you gotta make sense son, you can't be coming with shit like this:

COME ONN....

They do mention sandals though....

As for the mall rat rapper $tack Boys:

"So for all you flip flopin wearers out there,

you gotta get some slides and cut ya hair.

Cuz you gotta rock a fade when you're wearing the slides

on your bike, on your board, or in your mom's ride"

At least the $tack Boys lost fighting for something they believe in: wearing branded shoes at the mall to feel like strangers are looking at them and giving them some of the attention that they so desperately crave from their parents. Hey kids, you're more than what you wear on your feet or head. NOBODY CARES. It's not fun to try on sunglasses at the mall, it's dumb. Go do something worthwile with your life. Like make a video like the OFFICAL STACK BOYS (no dollar sign). At least they're winners and are comfortable with who they are. So they win. Easy.

INTRO SCORE 3/10
SOCKS AND SLIDES SCORE 0/10

It's not hate...it's pity.

We Got Something New! The Stack Boys "Snapbacks"

I would hate to let you go into your weekend without some $WAG. Let's get stupid, it's TGIF. Let's get punk'd! $ta¢k Boy$ STAND UP!

Snapback

Snapback

All I wear is

Snapbacks

"PUT ON SOME PANTS" - Adults

You know, not long ago this would have made me quite mad. In fact, a few seconds ago this would have made me mad. Especially when I saw the MANSION that these kids seem to have and the giant TV that they have, and the PROFESSIONAL recording equipment. Hey kids, you've got the good life. You can wear only sanpbacks if you want to. Most of us are struggling to make it check to check and whatever.com.


Do we really need a bunch of rich preteens flaunting their parent's wealth? No.


But then I had a thought that made me VERY HAPPY! If these freeloading kids are wasting their time on this nonsense (which is basically a commercial for the things they found at the mall), then they're not spending their time in school learning how to exploit working people. These kids were future oppressors, now they have no future in oppression thanks to them spending their time making dumbass videos that nobody wants to see. Keep wasting your time kids! See you in the unemployment line! The rich get dumber in this case! Power to the people.


SNAPBACKS SCORE 0/10

P.S. I also like how one of the $ta¢k Boy$ points out that it's stupid to rap about "drugs" and "actin' like a thug" but then proceeds to rap about hats and shoes and money for five minutes. He's mad at people acting hard in their songs, but then goes on to rap about driving Porsches when he is clearly nine years old. Not stupid at all.