Wednesday, May 16, 2012

U-God's Resume #45, Blondie "No Exit"

--Official Stats--
Artist: Blondie feat. U-God, Inspectah Deck, Mobb Deep, and Coolio
Song: "No Exit Remix"
Producer: Craig Leon
Album: No Exit
Release Date: October 22, 1999

Blondie? Really? Now this might surprise you, but I am a Blondie fan. I actualy own and listen to their music (Blondie is a band, Deborah Harry is the singer). You might also be surprised to learn that Blondie gets earned respect from older hip hop heads for helping bring hip hop into the mainstream back in the day. Rapture by Blondie was the first #1 rap song in the world (you would probably know the hook from KRS-ONE's sample of the song in his later version of "Rapture"). So that means that the first time most of the planet heard this shizzle called rap, they were listening to Blondie. And surprisingly Deborah wasn't softballing it, her hook is FIRE. Sure her rhymes were terrible nonsense (I mean unbearablely bad), but she did introduce this dope shit that was going down in NY to the world. Nice job.

But Rapture was in 1980, what in the hell is this 1999 No Exit shit and why is U-God on it? I'm assuming that this is a comeback album for Blondie, which is a bad sign. Plus, I'm going to guess that this is rock and roll / hip hop fusion, which I hate (even if it is Blondie, who were the original fusers). I guess it's time that we actually get some facts: my assumptions were correct. Except that this is a hip hop / rock / classical fusion (that's too many things). And, this song is identified and was given away as a "souvenir", uh-oh. Plus, I see like five versions of the track out there, UH-OH. PLUS, Mobb Deep and the Wu members on this track are identified as "the Loud Allstars" UUUHHH-OOHHH. I stongly suspect that this song will be the worst.

But I've never heard this before, and it's crammed with artists I respect and Coolio, so it might be good. Let's give it a listen...

"No Exit"

Well, that's something. That's too much. Too much organ. Too much Coolio. Too much Blondie raps. What a mess, right? I mean Deborah's introduction is appaling. She is trying way too hard and her hat is really surprising in a bad way. I don't know what she's saying but it sounds really bad. I never want to hear that again FOREVER-EVER-EVER. But just when you thought it couldn't get any worse, we have Coolio to set the bar even lower. What a crappy rapper. His flow and voice are a nightmare. What is was he doing with his life? How does this shit get on wax? And his trademark Coolio hair...was that still a thing in 1999?

Well, I'll be honest. I really don't want to see my favorite rappers in this video. I don't want them to share the stage with Blondie and Coolio. I don't want them on this song. Who thought it would be a good idea to put the hardest core, violentest rappers (Mobb Deep) up there with Blondie? Not to mention Deck (who is an animal on the mic). I'm very nervous.

We go from Coolio into a terrible little chorus bridge thing. The one thing that Blondie should be great terrible. "And when you least expect it...."

Prodigy is up first and kills this shit. 4real. It's like the whole song changes once he spits his first line, and he keeps the heat all the way trough his short verse with some traditional Mobb Deep shit that I actually would pay to hear. This kind of sounds like a Havoc beat and Prodigy does his thing. That guy is a pro. He'll be very tough to beat lyrically. I did least expect that.

U-God and Coolio
Our boy U-God is up next, and we've already established that he sounds okay on guitar heavy tracks, and he kills this shit too. In fact, he should hire the producer of this track to always manage his voice, because his shit sounds perfect. He flows well over the beat and I can (gratefully) say that he holds his own after Prodigy. That's saying a lot. So let me be clear: U-God comes correct and bodies this.

Then we have the chorus "Whooooo's gooonnaa fight for yooouuuuu", and I hate it.

To close out the track we have another Mobb Deep / Wu set up with Havoc and Deck. Just writing that made me happy, the Loud Allstars are ill. Havoc delivers exactly what you would expect. He's not as good as Prodigy but he's a hell of a lot better than anyone else behind the mic. But to be honest, I'm finding it hard to concentrate because I know that Deck is up next and he is one of my all time favorites. I know that he usually destroys everyone else with just his first line.
Inspectah Deck and Coolio
And sure enough, as soon as I hear his trademark "Yo!" over the top of Havoc I'm sold. He's the MC to beat here. Let's see...his verse is incredible as usual. We close it out with another dose of the chorus and some rocking that I never want to expose my children too, but the I gotta say, this collection of MC's was a smart move. The lyrical level is through the roof. This is honestly a Wu Tang + Mobb Deep collabo, all you have to do is skip the Deborah Harry and especially the Coolio and this could be a classic! I'm stunned. Let's start a movement:


Retweet it! Sign the online petition! Make a online petition! Do it! For #hiphop! #loudallstars

Track Score: 6/10 (if you took out Deborah Harry's verse and Coolio this would have been a 9)
U-God’s Score: 8/10
Impact on Rep (+,-,=): Harms (Nobody heard this one)

Next Week: MOM "Mr. Onsomeothershits". Yep. I've never heard of it either. It'll probably stink.

--U-God Lyrics--
Out of the darkness, spark this total chaos
Mark to scheme the hardest, nothing can save us
All that is sacred, dearly departed
Braveheart slave brave contains something courageous
Salute shining armor, persona rip stages
Loud as Nirvana, beneath the golden ages
The road rash explode, little rigor that devour
Don't cry for me, I'm bout drunk off the power

About this series: U-God’s Resume is a series of posts which looks at each line of U-God’s entire career to determine if his status as ‘wack’ is justified (as labeled by internet morons). I think it is not. U-God is dope. We'll prove it. Leave it to the Tort Team.

Deck and U-God (and maybe Prodigy).

1 comment:

  1. Yeah, U-God's entrance into this song was the only part I remembered (the best part).